I walk in the rain with my eyes fixed on the pavement. Each step I take makes water splash onto my already wet face. I barely notice it. My mind is plagued just like the kitchen sink back home that's currently being fixed. I wish there was something that could fix my mind too; that'd let thoughts enter and memories leave me like they used to.
I can't think straight. Hell, I can't think at all.
My mind, body and senses are stuck at the same thing ever since you left me. That goodbye; that painful goodbye. You were leaving me. Leaving me alone. Leaving me and going away to a completely new place to make brand new friends. You'll find many, I know. But for me you were the only one - my only friend; my best friend. When you called me over, I thought we were going to have the best time ever. I didn't fathom that you were waiting for my arrival to inform me about your departure.
"My family is shifting, Alice. We're moving to Texas.” You said in a low voice.
You were barely moving your lips but I heard each and every word clearly like you were yelling at the top of your voice. I froze on the spot as I started having gooseflesh all over me. Family.. Shifting.. Moving.. Texas.. The words formed a sinister fence around me and my head started spinning too fast. For a moment, I went blank and when my vision came back, everything was a blur. I didn't realize it was due to my tears until they reached my lips and I tasted the cupric droplets. I blinked, trying to fight my tears to see your beautiful face. But my vision went blank again. My mind got hazy and my legs were still rooted to the spot. When my blurred vision returned, I saw your outline once again, standing there with your head hanging limp. I wanted to walk towards you in quick strides, hold you and to shake you. To make you confess that you're kidding. That it's all a joke. A part of me even wanted to slap you for playing such senseless pranks on me. But my legs were nailed to the floor. It felt like the walls were engulfing me, the darkness advancing on me at lightening fast speed from all sides to swallow me. . .
Something pricks my eyes. No, it isn't the dirty rain water. It’s something else. Something with a copper-like taste. My tears have broken free again. This time I do not try stopping them. They need an outlet. I let them pour out and drain my eyes. I can barely see anything in the rain either way and on the plus side, once I reach home mom won't have to know that I have been crying. No one can differentiate between my tears and the rain. Well, no one except you..
I choke as I think of your name and your images take over my mind completely. That; in a mere nanosecond. I shake my head vigorously trying to brush away the images, the thoughts and those memories.. those.. breath taking memories. I choke on my breath again and the lump in my throat tightens; it hurts. But this hurt I can take. The hurt I am being put through on the insides, I can't. Just as I near my place, I trip on something. A stone submerged in the rain. I feel sharp pain shoot through my foot into my whole body like electric current as I fall face first with a loud splash on to the clogged up road. As I get up, I realize I cut my toe and maybe sprained my hand. It hurt insanely and I can barely move my hand as I get back on my feet. I swear under my breath.
Yet, even this pain I can take. But not -- I stop dead, rooted on the spot, staring at the entrance of my house. I see your blurred outline standing on the second step to the right, clutching the grill with your left hand and staring back at me. But- But this can't happen! I had just bid you good bye and was returning home from the airport!
"Move it girl! He's gone!” I yelled at myself between gasps that pierced my throat. The fall had surely addled my brains. I was seeing you everywhere now. Great. I could see how my days would be from now on. I’d be hallucinating and may be talking to those non-existent yous all life. Damn. I shake my head yet again, this time trying to see clearly or to the least, trying not to see things that are impossible.
I hang my head and start walking towards my house, expecting to walk straight into your image as I can still see it. More blurry but yes, there. But- I collide with something solid. Rock solid. Collide so hard that I'm almost thrown backwards. I brace myself for a second, this time brutal fall but the next thing I know, two hands throw themselves tightly around my waist and press me against the thing I banged into.
Then I realize it wasn't an illusion at all. It was you. It really was you! It IS you! My heart melts like butter on a hot pan as you shift my weight to one hand and bring the other forward. You wipe my cheek with your forefinger. You wipe not the rain drop. You wipe what only you can see.
You wipe my tear.
[Submitted as an entry in TYX's competition]
[Submitted as an entry in TYX's competition]
